If for the most part of your life you are trying to lose weight or keep the weight off probably your relationship with food is pretty screwed up.

Most likely you don’t even know how food taste anymore or how your body reacts to certain foods.

You are on prescribed diet plans and on autopilot when it comes to eating.

Fortunately there are more and more famous people are standing up against body shaming, which means more and more of us can let go of the idea that our body needs to be fixed.

Only then we can have a shot at developing a more relaxed relationship with food. Why?

Body image insecurity always screws up our relationship with food. Click To Tweet

Having a normal relationship with food is possible. A relationship without all the food noises in our head about what we should, could or must eat in order to feel good about ourselves. A relationship where our self-esteem and self-worth is not attached to how good or bad we eat.

How do you start to develop a normal relationship with food?

 It starts with self-trust.

When your mind is overactive around food and you don’t know if you are hungry or full, you need to activate… Click To Tweet

Most of us need some structure when we first want to eat like a normal eater. When food is just food and we can embrace it’s physical and emotional aspect of it. When we can let our mind enjoy what we feel like eating without guilt and shame.

Although trusting yourself with food doesn’t mean you are always going to get it right and you will no longer binge, overeat or deprive yourself with food.

It means you will be okay whatever decision you make around food.

To trust yourself with food doesn’t mean you are always going to get it right and you are not binging anymore.… Click To Tweet

Self-trust is about knowing that taking action doesn’t mean you will always get it right and be able to fully satisfy yourself. Sometime we eat more and less and sometimes we get hungrier sooner rather than later.

That doesn’t mean you did not get it right.

It means you are experiencing life. As with everything else life is trial and error and you have to be willing to take a leap of faith with food.

Normal eating is like intuitive eating. You listen to your body needs but you also listen to what your mind wants and based on the two of them you will eat.

Sometimes you will overeat sometimes you will eat unhealthy stuff, and sometimes you will eat healthy food and be able to satisfy yourself just right.

Learning your body’s language is like learning to speak a language. It is going to take time. The best way to do it is trying and don’t be afraid of it.

Here are a couple of nuggets on how to break through your “diet mind” into a “normal eater mind” until you get the hang of it:

  1. Legalizing food and true allowance of food starts with letting go of food rules.
  2. When you feel emotionally terrible, (guilt, shame) it is hard to know how your body feels from the food. Only eating the food itself doesn’t mean you truly let yourself enjoy it. You need to drop the shame, judging and guilt after eating as well. Then you truly allow it.
  3. Until you try to control your food, loss of control is inevitable.
  4. Food choices and eating are based on biological instinct. If your try to acknowledge your fullness by “should-ing” yourself to stop eating the last piece on your plate even if you are not hungry anymore you will create compulsiveness around finishing it. Don’t give it that much power. When you can chill that’s where the magic happens.
  5. People don’t make themselves sick with food unless they think they are doing something wrong.
  6. The only way to feel relaxed around food is to stop trying to control food.
  7. If you have a fear of let go of controlling your food eventually you will binge but trying to control your food will make you end up doing the very same thing, which is binging.
  8. As long as you are trying to NOT eat, you will always want to eat.
  9. Unless you stop trying to NOT eat, you will want to eat. It’s like telling yourself don’t think about the black sheep and you will end up thinking about the black sheep anyway.

Trusting yourself with food doesn’t mean you will not eat a lot of food or you will not restrict it. It means you will be okay either of your decisions.

You will not judge or shame yourself. You will let it be what it is, you chill and your moral character doesn’t get involved in your food choices.

You understand your food choices can be messy as much as life gets messy.

You are grateful for being alive and being able to have a messy life including good and bad food choices.

It means you are human, being alive. That’s all.

Hope this helps,

Take Care,


Photo Credit: Julia Pinter

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